Roommates. Whether you're a college student or a post-grad living on a budget, sharing living space with others is often a necessary evil. But fear not, my young and sexually frustrated friends! With a few helpful tips and a healthy dose of humor, you can survive even the most annoying of roommates.
First and foremost, establish some ground rules. And no, we're not talking about the "no sex in the living room" kind of rules. We're talking about the really important stuff, like who buys toilet paper and who takes out the trash. You don't want to be stuck in a situation where you're fighting over whose turn it is to clean up the mess from last night's party. Trust us, that's a recipe for disaster.
Another key to successful roommate coexistence? Communication. And we're not just talking about polite chit-chat over breakfast. You need to be able to talk to your roommates about everything from loud music to shared groceries to what to do when someone brings home a Tinder date. And let's face it, those conversations can get a little awkward. But hey, that's all part of the fun of living with others, right? A fun example my roommate freshman year of college went 18 years without knowing he screamed in his sleep and had a "sinus infection" which lasted all year which resulted in any time he exhaled it was with such force that Johnny Sins could not even match. It got to the point where I took refuge on my fraternities couch for nearly 2 months.
Of course, there will always be that one roommate who just can't seem to get their act together. Maybe they're always late with rent, or maybe they never clean up after themselves. Whatever the case may be, don't be afraid to speak up and call them out on their BS. And if all else fails, resort to passive-aggressive things like leaving that pile of dirty dishes that has been in the sink for 2 weeks in their bed, or keep switching WiFi periodically on and off throughout the day to confuse them. Trust us, these methods work wonders.
Finally, remember that living with roommates can actually be a lot of fun. Sure, there will be moments where you'll want to strangle each other, but there will also be moments of laughter and good times that you'll never forget. So embrace the chaos, enjoy the ride, and don't forget to stock up on earplugs and whiskey.
In conclusion, roommates are like herpes: they're annoying, they stick around forever, and they're impossible to get rid of. But with a little bit of patience, humor, and maybe some penicillin, you can survive even the worst of roommates.
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