Dating apps. The technological wonder that allows us to swipe through hundreds of potential dates while sitting on the toilet. It’s like window shopping for love, with a side of possible STDs. But what does your choice of dating app really say about you as a post-grad? Let’s take a look.
Tinder - The OG of hookup apps. If you’re on Tinder, you’re probably looking for one thing and one thing only: a quick and easy way to satisfy your primal urges. Swipe right if you’re down to hook up, swipe left if you’re not. Bonus points if you’re into handcuffs and have a mugshot on file.
Bumble - So, you got banned from Tinder for putting your Venmo in your bio? or you’re just over the constant stream of unsolicited dick pics. Enter Bumble, the app where the ladies make the first move. You probably downloaded it because your friend who’s a Bumble campus ambassador forced you to. But hey, maybe you’re looking for something more than just a booty call. Maybe you’re ready to settle down and find a semi-stable relationship. Or maybe you’re just tired of being harassed for a 3 am hookup by someone you just added on Snapchat six hours ago.
Hinge - Congratulations, you’re starting to get serious about finding a real relationship. You’ve gotten most of your wild side out and are ready to give it a shot with someone who’s actually interested in more than just a quick hookup. You’re probably swiping through profiles while drinking a glass of wine and thinking about the future. You might even be picturing your future wedding on a vineyard somewhere in Napa Valley. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves.
Plenty of Fish - Does anyone actually use this app? It’s like the ugly stepchild of dating apps. We’ve all heard of it, but have any of us actually tried it? It’s like being set up on a blind date with someone who might be a serial killer or, worse, a 64-year-old male who’s on the neighborhood watch list. The only time I've seen this show referenced has been on MTV's Catfish. Let’s just say your chances of finding love on this app are about as likely as winning the lottery.
So, there you have it. Your choice of dating app says a lot about what you’re looking for in the post-grad dating world. Just remember, no matter what app you’re on, always use protection and don’t be a creep. Happy swiping!
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